CARLY Chanel Ballet Flats

I had another idea for a Reel but this is where I ended up. Honestly cried while editing it and considered not posting it. Sometimes it’s hard to “show up” for work when showing up is public-facing. I can’t fully explain how I’m feeling right now because I’m so in the middle of it. But sometimes I just want to put a disclaimer before everything with: I have no idea what I’m doing and I don’t really feel good in my body while doing it ✌🏻 maybe from the outside looking in it does look like that? I think if I watched myself from a window I would think that too: she’s a great mom! she gets a lot of cool free stuff! she is working with my favorite brands! (Fill in the blank!) But yea, sometimes I am just stuck with the bad tapes in my head and thinking, “I’m not good enough. I need to do more.”

I think this week it was really triggered after being at an event with amazing women and feeling this crushing pressure. Like looking around the room and not measuring up. In looks, in business, in drive. And don’t get me wrong, I am IMPRESSED and PROUD of them. I also imagine that I can’t be the only one feeling that way 🤷🏻‍♀️

No point, no lesson. This is just where I am this week… and again, this Reel was going to be one thing and it turned into this. Maybe we can just call it a Real-ity instead.